Pause – a café that can kill one with its outlandish noises

1.

 I tried to find a new café to death!

As an amateurish story teller and writer, In the past couple of years, I desperately wanted to work  in a quiet, romantic and bourgeois  site where I could think uninterrupted for one hour or two. Yes, you are right, like what professional writers ( Jk. Rolling?) always do, I want to sit in a café  like a philosopher, write on a piece of tissue, and look around curiously and maniacally mimicking a sociopath for inspiration.  

Unfortunately, just like many “ New First Line” cities, my dear city has been so commercialized that I  would take my café pilgrimage by wandering around like a “walking-dead,”  and eventually end up somewhere too tedious, standardized, noisy and energy – sucking – places called Starbucks.

I  would then scream, and even slap my face because,for god’s sake, I am a Gemini – famous for being cool, possessing “street-smart”  and creative -  I need some fresh creativity -no matter what that is!

This is why on this  depressingly cloudy, gloomy and pm 2.5 permeating afternoon, my “survivor instinct” pushed me to explore this industrial  city’s  “ insider” corner cafes. I will certainly not be disappointed. 

As a  “ nerdy” geek, like most writers do, I am not usually professional at “ scavenger-hunting,” but basing  on some online friends’ advices, I successfully landed on NXV– a few small winding and intersected alleys assembling Suzhou’s Pingjiang road or Shanghai’s Tian Zi fang - except that the alleys were located nearby a few universities famously known for their fine arts and literature majors, and a small numbers of foreign students who should represent cultural diversity.

A classic and golden area for incubating interesting  street cafes! 

2.

Riding a shared-bike into one of these alleys, I first saw many old condo buildings made up in 1980s, and was surprised by a sense of rare nostalgia risen up. Inside of these torn-up buildings, looking close enough, some grannies were babysitting their kids’ kids; dusty and noisy constructions work were on -many of these buildings are 6-story tall, and their residents paid money to add elevators for their parents’ convenience. 

Stepping closer to one building, its first story has fully been renovated and redecorated  to allocate some small cafes and bookstores. Bingo! This is it – my destination is successfully “unlocked.”

Looking around with a bit of surprise, some of these cafes were not directly attached to the first floor. Instead, they  “ hung ” 5 or 6 feet above, and I needed to climb up a few steps to reach inside. 

“ This is special!” I wondered.  No Starbucks would ever hang anywhere.

Apart from the “hanging” part, I was also attracted to the bright and rainbow-colored graffiti art on some of these cafes’ walls, which would never appear inside or outside of a Costa or Luck In.

Inside of these cafes, I fantasized seeing white wooden Greek-styled tables with silver ashtrays siting on top of them for lethargic smokers and idle daydreamers. Here, I would order smoked salmon, egg benedicts, garden salad and strong, black Italian espressos.  

I took my courage, climbed up  the 15 steps attached to one of the graffiti- decorated cafes. 

What?! It was locked, and peeping inside, it had been changed to an art classroom –  the commercial one that would promise you to pass our nation’s art exam within 3 weeks or guarantee you to take out an oil paint – your work of art - filled with your creativity juice within an hour or two.

A little bit disappointed.

Still, I have always been a shiny optimist.

Haven’t Chicken Soup books encouraged us to try?  “ Trying is power!!!”

Stepping down, I “pilgrimaged”  forward to find another café named PAUSE! 

PAUSE, an attractive name, isn’t it? Spelling it  word by word, this café sounds like  a place where thirsty and exhausted coffee lovers/ writers like me could be welcomed, make a short pause, and rest a second, excluding from  a  tech-overwhelming  and busy world. 

“ Hello!” I exaggerated my face and formed a grin. This is what Hollywood movie stars do to seduce their fans, and I did it to show I was in a good mood, and hopefully to leave a warm impression on people inside. 

“May be I would be surprised by PAUSE’s some-what “ pausing” style – white coat wearing  and good-mannered waiters would serve me  hot Earl-grey  with freshly baked sweet, crispy and aromatic French cookies.”

“ I would love that!” “ I would tip them.” 

I wish.

Instead, this Pause is a trashy place  that nobody was willing to make even an eye contact with their supposedly beloved customers.

This ridiculous PAUSE is not even a café; it’s a site combining coffee and beef kebab selling. 

What’s wrong with the boss? 

 I couldn’t  help, but wondering, how on earth  can this PAUSE  owner  be so idiotically “ creative”  that he/she  combined the watery  coffee and the feisty  kebab  element that would never intertwine harmoniously together? 

Imagine for a second!  You Drink your coffee and devour  your greasy and smoky pork and beef kebab. Afterwards, you wipe your full mouth of grease, and then sip your milky, creamy and rich café latte.

It’s like chewing a mouth of kimchi and then have a bottle of red wine drunk up. 

How gross is that?! 

Let alone you would have to smell the choking  smoke from the tiny and poor-ventilated kitchen.

Even worse, the inside of the PAUSE was really dark and unfriendly. 

Covered by the gloom, and smelled like mold and fermented socks, a few pale men and women were playing loud and cheap cellphone games. 

A far cry from PAUSE.  

PAUSE should be named  Creepy Ghost House!

These sitting people were  so cellphone- hooked and bursting noisy that as if they were inside of their own parallel universe named DEAF, and even forgot to serve their customers. 

Yes, these people were supposed to be waiters and waitresses! 

I  forced myself to say my pre-rehearsed “hi” friendly and warmly ( I shouldn’t) to those “deaf” staffs,  and an “ oily” man in probably his 30s looked up at me as if I owed him a million  dollars– he was this surreal  café& kebab site’s barista. 

I was always optimistic, remember? So  I was trying to cheer up by asking this site’s history with my usual charismatic style. “ how many years has this place been opened?” No use. 

The game-hooked barista was so raged, angry and lost in his stupid game that he had also lost his human traits long time ago. When I made another eye contact with him, I saw pathetic hollowness and the fear of being disturbed, more exactly, the fear of living a real 

life. 

I was scared by that emptiness and lack of meaning – this oily middle-aged zombie would better not be my future.

3.

Anyway, I am an optimist, after all, and I decided to give PAUSE and its coffee a try. 

Shockingly, It’s not as awful as I thought it would be – made by an unconscious man who got stuck inside of his lightless space and meaninglessness! 

Maybe, just maybe, the barista was a human once. 

He may have some dreams back then, and even burnt some nights’ oils to practice making coffee.

Could it be possible that he was once dreaming of standing on the stage of the world Coffee Champion Competition smiling like an innocent kid celebrating as the winner of the contest?  

I don’t know, and I don’t want to know ! 

4.

What made this insane PAUSE place a little bit sane is a small balcony outside, a mini “ hanging garden” 3 feet above the ground, surrounded by some wild flowers and green plants. Three foldable chairs were casually placed on the floor, and on one of them, a fat and sleepy cat was dozing off. 

I am a cat person. 

For this kitten’s sake, I should be a little bit more forgiving for the cell-playing zombies inside, right? 

I am a born optimist, after all. 

I sat next to the cat, sipped my coffee, and for  the first time of the day, turned on my computer – this “ hanging garden”-styled balcony reminded me of some similar places in Vietnam and Rio where residents embrace freedom, independence, democracy and innovation. 

I was just about to relax and blend into the tranquil atmosphere.

5.

I fantasized again; this time, I could finally be ZEN; I could spend some time observing a few  old ladies passing by; I could close my eyes for seconds enjoying the pm2.5 air blowing gracefully on my cheap and heavy metal-contained moisturizer-glistened rosy cheek. 

I wanted to fly and be a critically-claimed writer just like JK. ROLLING!

No damn luck.  Inside of the surreal PAUSE, the waiters, waiters and their “ evil” cellphone-hooked boss had just finished their deafening and brainless cellphone game, and now decided to light their cigarette and chain smoke !